I originally wrote this several years ago, but I needed to hear it again today and thought perhaps someone else did too.
As I look out my
bedroom window, I see the broken tree that once was a source of irritation now
as a source of life.
It was struck by
lightning several years before we moved here and was slowly dying inside as the
years passed. We didn’t know this until the inside of the tree revealed the
truth about its history and trauma. One afternoon while eating lunch, my
husband and I heard a loud boom as the top of the massive tree tumbled into the
barn that we had hoped to someday turn into a mother-in-law suite. The tree
crashed through the top floor of the barn and destroyed most of the furnishings
we had there. The tree that looked so healthy on the outside was nothing but a
hollowed, decaying mess on the inside. The insurance surveyor showed us a dark
line around the middle of the trunk where the lightning once struck. Everything
above that line was broken and lifeless, only we didn’t know it until the heavy
winds proved it to be true.
The
leftover stump of this tree is about 15 feet high. Finances didn’t allow us to
actually remove the stump at the time, and we were assured that all of the
dangerous parts fell off in the crash. So each time I look out my window at our
beautiful wooded backyard, I see this strange, curved, broken, dead tree stump
in the midst of all of the other healthy trees and become irritated that we
never had the ability to just remove this old, worthless tree.
Two years after
that happened we made a discovery that has changed my whole perspective of that
tree. In the middle of suburban Georgia
with a major road only half a mile from our home, a couple of Barred Owls have
decided to use our old tree as the spot to raise their new family. The male and
a female, both of whom we have only seen once or twice a year prior to this,
have found a safe place to keep their
eggs, a place high enough up that predators can’t reach it and man can’t
explore it. These massive, beautiful birds now live in our backyard among the
squirrels, chipmunks and other birds. A few days ago, two new little birds
emerged from that old stump and new life began where once was only death. Each
evening we watch as the little ones poke their head from the top of that tree
and look around their new world as they wait for Mom and Dad to deliver the
food they will need until they are strong enough to get it on their own. They
are fuzzy and have no feathers, but over the next few weeks they will not look
very different from the majestic parents who have cared for them up to this
point.
I feel like that
broken tree sometimes. I have had times where God has used me and I felt alive
and useful and that somehow I could give back to the One who has given so much
to me. There have been times when I could bless others with the shade from my
branches and the rest in my counsel and wisdom for others. But then there are
broken moments when I feel as useless as that old tree. How can I give when the
life has been sucked out of me? How can I bless others financially when every
bill collector threatens to cut off our very existence? How can I share the
message of Life when things are decaying around me?
Perhaps you feel
like that tree too. Has lightning struck you in places where you doubt you will
ever see life again? Maybe the lightning came from broken relationships, or
broken dreams. Maybe yours was all at once through a divorce, or miscarriage or
diagnosis, or maybe you have been dying a little at a time and have no idea how
to reverse this trend. You are very much like that old tree if you feel useless
in your calling; that God is either finished using you or has no intention to
ever start. Do you want desperately to see fruits in your life but know that
fruit can’t grow from a dead place so you have given up trying? Do you struggle
to keep things looking green and healthy on the outside but know that it’s only
a matter of time before the winds come and the world sees that everything is
just empty inside? Don’t despair. The
Giver of Life can use you and restore you to a place where life springs forth
and fruits come in abundance.
With our old tree,
there was a time of waiting. It took time for the tree to be weathered away and
just the right fit for our family of owls to nest there. It took the sun and
the cold and the wind and the storms over the last few years to make that trunk
ready for the life to come out it. So it is with our lives. In the midst of it
all, there are winds we must face that make us stronger, and storms that make
us know who our Redeemer truly is. And sometimes worse than the storms is the
time of calmness in between the trials. It is these times that the tree must
have felt ready to burst forth in life, but for whatever reason it was not the
right timing. Oh how difficult those times of waiting are in our lives!
Before the mother
owl was able to build her nest in that old trunk, she must have had a number of
things to remove first in order to make room for her eggs. Fallen leaves may
have made a soft nest for her little ones, but old branches and other trash had
to go before she knew that it was the right place to start her family.
Sometimes it hurts when God removes those painful, distracting parts of our
lives, but it is always, ultimately to prepare a heart that’s soft and
compassionate, and a place for the Holy Spirit to dwell.
So if you are
broken and feeling empty and not sure if there is any life left in you, rest in
the assurance that God can use any heart that is fully surrendered to Him. Ask
Him to heal the place where the lightning struck and where the death began to
creep into your world. Give Him the hard, rough parts that are holding you back
and let Him remove them and replace them with the foundation for fruit to grow
and flourish. Surrender the broken feelings and trust that He will never deny a
broken and contrite heart. The Author of Life can restore life back into your
broken places when your heart finds repentance and your life is surrendered to
all that He has for you.
There is life
waiting to burst forth in you. How glorious this life will be when the waiting
is over and your faithfulness is honored. Let nothing stand in the way of
letting Him fill you with a new life in Him. What He says He will do, He will
do.
